Wednesday, December 26, 2007

one year


In the face of the new year, people tend to reflect on their lives and for some reason, perhaps the symbolism of an 'official' new year, they look to make changes or take inventory of their personal affairs. I'm no exception and looking back on the past year leaves me in a whirlwind mess of confusion. I feel that it's been monumental in terms of my own personal self discovery and life experience, and on the other hand I have felt more pain, sadness, and total despair this year than ever in my life. What I'm left with is many good memories, many sad ones, leaps forward, huge set backs, selfless love, and unbearable loss. I'd like to think that it builds character:)

It's Christmas today.. I've spent the past few days here with my parents enjoying their company, and enjoying the solitude of suburban life. It occurred to me that I hadn't spent too much time wondering how this holiday would be for me this year... I'm glad for that because I didn't want to come here feeling apprehensive. But, of course I've been re-living being in my parents house last Christmas... conversations had, words that I regret, and the phone call that ended my relationship and my life as I knew it. This Christmas has been a bittersweet one and I'm feeling a twinge of discomfort and sadness that I haven't felt in awhile. I hope it's healthy to revisit it now and again, and since it will be one year tomorrow that it all ended (or began, depending on how you look at it) it's probably normal.

So it's a year later; What do I want out of this new year? I have absolutely no expectations or preconceived ideas about how this year should go. Aside from some professional development and further personal growth, I'm just going to step into the next year and see where it takes me.

Merry Christmas & Happy New year :)

4 comments:

Anthony said...

Shannon, I have a feeling 2008 is gonna be a great one for ya.

Mlle said...

thank you Anthony. I hope so :)

Di Mackey said...

Happy 2008, I wish you everything in the new year - strength, happiness, courage, everything you need and more.

Love to you, and huge hugs.
xoxoxox

Mlle said...

Thanks Di.. your support and well wishes mean a lot :) xo